Embodied Anal Pleasure & Prostate Play with Dr. Charlie Glickman
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In This Episode
Rahi speaks with Dr. Charlie Glickman, who holds a PhD in adult sex education and works as a sex and relationship coach, somatic sexuality educator and sexological bodyworker in Seattle. With more than 35 years in the field, including many years leading education at Good Vibrations, Charlie co-authored The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure. He shares how a serious back injury, and pelvic massage from sexological bodywork co-creator Chester Mainard, showed him what touch can do that talk alone cannot.
This is a gentle, embodied guide to anal pleasure and prostate play. Listeners learn why anal play never has to hurt, how a long, slow exhale helps the pelvic floor soften, and how to time insertion with the receiver’s breath. Charlie explains why arousal should come first, why the receiver should guide pace, depth and toy size, and how shame and fear held in the pelvis can surface and be met with care. The conversation also explores pelvic armoring in men, the erotic shadow, the idea of a shame hangover, and why giving and receiving anal touch can make anyone a more attuned lover.
Today’s Guest:
Charlie Glickman PhD is a sex & relationship coach, a somatic sexuality educator, a sexological bodyworker, and an internationally-acclaimed speaker. He’s been working in this field for over 35 years, and some of his areas of focus include sex & shame, sex-positivity, queer issues, masculinity & gender, communities of erotic affiliation, and many sexual & relationship practices. Charlie is also the co-author of The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure: Erotic Exploration for Men and Their Partners. In February 2023, Charlie completed an accountability process. For more info about that or to learn about his coaching offerings, visit www.makesexeasy.com
What You’ll Learn About Anal Pleasure & Prostate Play
Somatic Healing Beginnings: Charlie’s journey into hands-on sexuality work began after a debilitating back injury that was relieved by pelvic bodywork from Chester Maynard, highlighting the healing power of touch beyond talk therapy.
Embodied Shame Work: His study of shame led him to recognize its somatic components, prompting him to train in sexological bodywork and explore how shame lives in the body and can be released through touch.
Experience Over Theory: Despite decades in sex education, Charlie discovered that real transformation happens through embodied experiences, not just intellectual discussion.
Redefining Anal Sex: He advocates for a broad and embodied definition of anal sex that includes any erotic anal touch, not just intercourse, focusing on pleasure and relaxation rather than performance.
Importance of Breath and Safety: Relaxation and slow, breath-synced insertion are key to pleasurable anal play; working with the body rather than against it prevents pain and trauma.
Receiver Control in Play: Especially when using toys or strap-ons, the receiver’s control over pacing, depth, and arousal is crucial to creating a safe, enjoyable experience.
Toxic Masculinity & Pelvic Armoring: Cultural conditioning often causes men to dissociate from their pelvic floor, leading to tension, shame, and reduced sensation—something that can be reversed through embodiment.
Healing Through Erotic Shadow Play: Exploring core erotic fantasies can heal childhood wounds when approached with awareness and emotional safety, turning shadow into transformative pleasure.
Prostate Pleasure & Misconceptions: Charlie’s book addresses the myths and stigma around prostate pleasure, especially fears around pain, mess, and sexual identity, providing inclusive, practical guidance.
The Anus as Foundational Chakra: Anatomically and energetically, the anus is the body’s original point of development—central to vitality, embodiment, and somatic awakening.
Go Deeper: Related Articles
Common Questions About This Episode
Does anal sex have to hurt?
According to Dr. Charlie Glickman, no. He calls the idea that pain turns into pleasure with practice a persistent myth, and says pushing through pain can be traumatic. Pain is a signal to slow down. The work is about relaxing the body open with breath, arousal and patience, not stretching or forcing.
How can I relax my body for anal play?
Charlie recommends starting with a couple of minutes of breathing with a long, slow exhale, which helps the pelvic floor soften. Begin with other pleasures such as kissing or oral sex so anal play is a side dish at first, and time any insertion with the receiver’s exhale, pausing on the inhale.
Does enjoying prostate play mean a man is gay?
This was one of the most common worries in Charlie’s survey of about 200 men and partners for The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure. In the episode he frames it as a matter of masculine conditioning and fear rather than orientation, and notes that men who have received anal touch often become more skillful, attuned givers.
What is a shame hangover?
Charlie uses the phrase shame hangover for waking up irritable or ashamed after sexual play, a sign you may have gone further than you were ready for. Waking up smiling suggests you are on track. He encourages treating overdoing it as data rather than failure, and mapping and healing a wound before playing with it.
Go Deeper Into This Work
If this conversation is stirring something in you, Rahi’s Reclaiming Your Pleasure takes you into the body-based practices that support this kind of reclamation – moving shame, restoring aliveness, and expanding your capacity for pleasure in your own body.
A guided pathway to reconnect with your body, restore sensitivity, and awaken your innate capacity for pleasure.
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About This Podcast & Your Host
We explore the restoration of pleasure, the reclamation of sexual sovereignty, and the realization of our organic sexual wholeness. We engage with leading somatic therapists, sexologists & sexological bodyworkers, and holistic practitioners worldwide who provide practical wisdom from hands-on experiences of working with clients and their embodied sexuality. We invite a deep listening to the organic nature of the body, its sexual essence, and the bounty of wisdom embodied in its life force.
Rahi Chun
Certified Somatic Sex Educator & Sexological Bodyworker
Rahi is fascinated by the intersection of sexuality, psychology, spirituality and their authentic embodiment. Based in Los Angeles, he is an avid traveler and loves exploring cultures, practices of embodiment, and healing modalities around the world.
