Sexological Bodywork for Sexual Trauma: What 355 Client Intakes Show

In my practice, sexological bodywork for sexual trauma is the main reason people come: 41% of the 355 clients whose intakes I read came to heal sexual trauma held in the body. Just behind it, at 13 to 14% each, came pain during sex, trouble with orgasm, numbness and shame.

As a Certified Somatic Sex Educator and Sexological Bodyworker specializing in genital de-armoring, I keep notes on every person I work with. When I went back through them, I realized they held something this field rarely shares: a count of what people actually come in hoping to heal, in their own words. If you’re wondering whether what you carry is unusual, I hope these numbers tell you it isn’t.

One thing to hold as you read: these are the people who chose me, a sexological bodyworker who specializes in genital de-armoring and resolving sexual trauma. People find me because of that focus, so these numbers describe my practice and the people drawn to it, not why everyone seeks sexological bodywork.

What do clients seek from sexological bodywork for sexual trauma with me?

Across my notes there are 435 client records, and 355 of them had an intake clear enough to read. I read each one by hand and recorded what the person said they came for. Most named two or three things, so the shares below add up to more than 100%.

Further down the list came medical procedures, surgery, cancer or scars (8%), religious or family conditioning about sex (7%), feeling safe enough to trust in intimacy (7%), dissociation, or leaving the body (6%), low or lost desire (6%), healing a birth, pregnancy loss or abortion (6%), fear of intimacy and of getting close (5%), letting go of control and learning to surrender (5%), and preparing for partnership after being single or separated (4%).

Why is sexual trauma the most common reason?

Partly because it is my specialty. People carrying sexual trauma look for a practitioner who focuses on it, and that is a large part of why so many of my clients named it. Within that, trauma is the front door. 41% of people named it directly, and it almost never arrives alone. It usually comes with a second wish: to feel more, to orgasm, to receive, or for the pain to stop.

That pairing matters. Many people don’t come in saying “I want to work with my trauma.” They come in saying “I can’t feel anything” or “it hurts,” and the history surfaces once the body feels safe enough to show it. If you’ve ever wondered why your body went still when you meant to say no, why freezing happens is often where this work begins.

Are pain, orgasm, numbness and shame connected?

In my practice they behave like a cluster. Pain during or after sex (14%), trouble with orgasm (13%), numbness (13%) and shame (13%) sit right behind trauma, and many people carry two or three of them at once. Together they are the heart of what genital de-armoring addresses.

Numbness in particular is often misunderstood. Here’s a composite of several clients I’ve worked with: a woman in her 30s who could feel a great deal outside but very little inside, and who quietly wondered whether something was wrong with her. Over two to six sessions, as inner tissue was met with patient, consensual touch, it went from numb, to tender, to pleasure. She wasn’t broken. She was asleep inside, and sleeping tissue can wake. If that sounds familiar, why you can’t feel anything during sex goes deeper.

Pain often follows the same logic. When tests come back clear and the pain stays real, the tissue itself is frequently holding on. I write about that in pelvic pain with no diagnosis.

What usually happens in the body during the work?

These are patterns from my own practice notes, not research. I share them because they’re what people most want to know before they begin.

• Numb, then tender, then pleasure. Numb tissue often becomes sore before it becomes pleasurable. Pain on the way back can be a good sign.
• Voice comes before sensation. The most consistent turning point is the first spoken “no” or “pause,” or another empowered voicing of the body’s choices on the table. Gains in sensation tend to follow it.
• Grief often comes before pleasure. Tears, often grief discharging from the body, frequently come before the first new pleasure when they are simply held.
• Regulate first. In pain cases, pelvic pain often eased once unconditional safety, presence and attunement down-regulated the nervous system, before the painful spot was touched at all.
• The throat and pelvis hold together. A tight throat or jaw showed up alongside pelvic holding in many clients.
• Pleasure heals. Enhanced pleasure in a down-regulated body, with full autonomy, agency and consent, can metabolize past trauma and stories in the body that run counter to embodied wholeness and peace.

Voice before sensation is the one I return to most. Another composite of several clients I’ve worked with: a woman in her late 30s, raised in a strict religious home, who said “it’s fine” before she had checked with her body. When she was invited to vocalize her body’s desires, one word for each touch (“yes,” “softer,” “slower”), sensation came forward area by area. Learning to ask for and refuse touch out loud opened what pressure never could.

How many sessions does it usually take?

In my experience, meaningful shifts tend to arrive by about sessions two to five, and a new kind of orgasm opens for many people by about sessions four to eight. I offer that as what I’ve witnessed, not a promise. Every body sets its own pace, and the pace is part of the healing.

What can these numbers tell you, and what can’t they?

These numbers reflect who seeks me out, not who seeks sexological bodywork in general. I’m known for genital de-armoring and for resolving sexual trauma, so many people arrive carrying trauma, pain, numbness and shame, and they name those first at intake.

They also capture only part of my work. Couples come to me through Divine Union For Lovers, the practice I share with my partner Ariel Szabo, and men’s sexual health is a core focus of mine, from erections and ejaculation to prostate health and learning to receive. That is the heart of my upcoming course for men, SOVEREIGN. What men and couples bring can look different on an intake form, yet the same body-based work sits underneath it.

What these numbers can tell you is what people bring when they come to this kind of trauma-focused, body-based work, and that you are far from alone in it.

How were these numbers counted?

I read every intake by hand. Of 435 client records, 355 had an intake or intention section clear enough to read, and I recorded what each person said they came for. Because most people named two or three things, the shares add up to more than 100%. The observations about what happens in the body come from my session notes and describe my practice, not a clinical study. No names, dates, places or identifying details were kept, only the totals you see here. To understand the modality itself, start with what sexological bodywork is. The care I describe also rests on principles shared across trauma-informed practice, which the U.S. Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration lays out in Trauma-Informed Care in Behavioral Health Services.

Common questions

1. Why do most of your clients come to you?

To heal sexual trauma held in the body. Of 355 readable client intakes, 146 people, or 41%, named it. That reflects my specialty in genital de-armoring and trauma resolution, since people seek out practitioners who focus on what they carry. It usually came with a second wish, such as feeling more, being able to orgasm, receiving touch or ending pain.

2. Is it common to feel numb during sex?

Yes. 45 of 355 clients, about 13%, came in because they couldn’t feel much, especially inside. In my experience numbness is usually protection rather than damage, and tissue often moves from numb, to tender, to pleasure as the body learns it’s safe.

3. Can sexological bodywork help with pain during sex?

Pain during or after sex was the second most common reason people came, named by 48 of 355 clients. In my practice, pelvic pain often eased once safety, presence and attunement settled the nervous system, sometimes before the painful spot was touched at all. Any new or worsening pain belongs with a doctor first.

4. How many sessions does sexological bodywork take?

In my experience, meaningful shifts tend to come by about sessions two to five, and a new kind of orgasm opens for many people by about sessions four to eight. That’s what I’ve witnessed, not a promise, and every body sets its own pace.

5. Is this research?

No. These are counts from my own client notes, read by hand, and observations from my practice. They describe the people who chose this work with me, not the general population, and no identifying details were kept.

Where to go from here

If you recognized yourself somewhere in these numbers, you’re not alone, and you’re not broken. Whatever brought you here, a body that won’t feel, a body that hurts, or a history it’s still holding, there are hundreds of people who walked in with the same wish.

If you want a place to begin, the Genital Awakening Meditation is free, and comes with a 12-point genital armor checklist so you can see what your own body is carrying.

And if you’re ready to go further at your own pace, Reclaiming Your Pleasure is where this work continues.

Rahi Chun is a Certified Somatic Sex Educator and Sexological Bodyworker, and the founder of Rahi Chun. This piece draws on counts from his own client intake notes and observations from his practice.